Keith who?

You'll Think Of Me"

I woke up early this morning around 4 a.m.
With the moon shining bright as headlights on the interstate
I pulled the covers over my head and tried to catch some sleep
But thoughts of us kept keeping me awake
And ever since you found yourself in someone else's arms
I've been tryin' my best to get along
But that's ok, there's nothing left to say, but

Take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need 'em
Take your space and take your reasons
But you'll think of me
And take your cap and leave my sweater
'Cause we have nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me, you'll think of me

I went out driving trying to clear my head
I tried to sweep out all the ruins that my emotions left
I guess I'm feeling just a little tired of this
And all the baggage that seems to still exist
It seems the only blessing I have left to my name
Is not knowing what we could have been,
or what we should have been, so...

Take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need 'em
Take your space and take your reasons
But you'll think of me
And take your cap and leave my sweater
'Cause we have nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me

Someday I'm gonna run across your mind
But don't worry, I'll be fine
I'm gonna be alright
While you're sleeping with your pride
Wishing I could hold you tight
I'll be over you, and on with my life

So take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need 'em
And take your cap and leave my sweater
'Cause we have nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
but you’ll think of me

So take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need 'em
Take your space and all your reasons
But you'll think of me
And take your cap and leave my sweater
'Cause we got nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me, you'll think of me, yeah

And you're gonna think of me oh yeah
Ohh someday baby, someday
Ooohh…

Lately I've been hearing this song almost all the time. I had this song on my head last night, this morning and when I swithched the radio-there it was 'the' song. Before this I was not aware of Keith Urban at all.

I only know who he is after he become Mr Nicole Kidman. So, this morning I googled him and OMG, he has lots of songs under his name and it's amazing that I knew nothing about him before this. I guess this happened after you left your adolencense years. You feel like music means nothing to you, especially new type of music. You hang on to you kind of music, or the singer that you are familiar with. Ask me anything about Bon Jovi and I can tell you about them. How many kids Jon have(4), Is Richie still with Heather(No), but ask me who is 50 cents? 50 who?? My only update to the latest in music either from my daughter or from Akademi FAntasia( that's whay I like this programme!!!)

I don't watch MTV and VH1 except for 'the year it was' and sometimes Double shot if they shows the 80s' and 90s', this shows how much I have aged!! I guess you can always tell the person age according to their taste in music( this however does not apply to my dear husband who taste in music like someone from age stone ok??-who listen to Hetty Koes endang, anyway??)Personally I think most of the new songs are cater for younger people, they do not make songs like they use to do, well may be some of it anyway but after listening to Keith, I realized that they are few singers that produced nice songs, like Maroon 5, Keith Urban, and I kinnda like Avril Lavigne and lately I have been listening to songs by Kelly CLarkson(because Tasya likes her)

I like this song because it is a nice song, nothing to do about my feeling, so people do not get me wrong, ok.(you know who you are). This is the song that I can listen to. Maybe after this I will watch MTV or VH1 once awhile to keep me updated on the latest music scene, so that the next time people ask me about 50 cents, not only I know who he is, I can even sing or rap or hip-hop his sings!!!! heh!heh! like hat actually going to happen!!!!

False Accusations

Last night someone very close and dear to me made an false accusation at me. I was shocked and hurt at the same time. And the funny thing is that the accusation came out from nowhere. This person did not give me any clue that it was coming.

Earlier everything was ok, we even joked with each other, having a normal conversation about life and family. Then after dinner while watching TV, he casually made that accusation!!! I was shocked and speechless. What hurt me the most was not the accusation itself but by making that he implied that he does not know me at all. After all the years that we been together and what we went thru, he should know me better than even thinking about that let alone saying it outloud.

I was pissed off but knowing him well, he will not listen to any of my explanations and even when I asked him why he said those thing. He just kept quiet and started saying something rubbish about how he think I felt. That the most painful part, he just assumed the worse of me, does not all my sacrifices toward him count at all?? Have I complained to him about our life(part from my work-which does not count here), have I even demanded things that I know we cannot afford?, Have I ever?? I think all this while I have been a very good person to him. Well, maybe I was wrong. Maybe to him it still not enough, maybe I have to do more to prove that I am actullay worth it to have in his life. Maybe.....

But one thing for sure, this is not the first time he did this to me and I'm sure this is not the last time either. Even if it is, the damage have been done. I can forgive but it's hard for me to forget the accusation that he threw at me.

Have some respect

I been working in my current position for almost 4 years now. At first it was shocking to see how malaysian treat another malaysian-regardless of races and ages. My position here-officially is Customer Relation Executive, unofficially I was receptionist. Basically what I do was explainig to the customers about our services, then collect money if they want to register for the class. I also have to deal with parents from our Young Learners classes.

The way Malaysian treat us was so shocking that I feel ashamed to call myself Malaysian. They treat us(me and my colleague) with no respect whatsoever!!! They threw money and their credit card at you, they treat you like you are nobody. Do you know how sad it is when people threw money at you?? You are respectable and educated human being and yet people can treat you like that. The most dissapointing part is because I'm working in customer service part-I do not have the right to tell them off. Sometimes I was so close of throwing back their card at them and ask them get off, and don't bother coming back!!! Unfortunately-wish only!!!

Sometimes, you will get those students who have to RESIT their exam came to you with the stupid slang and talk to you like you are stupid or something. They will come and say thing like "I'm here to take my BRITISH UNIVERSITY EXAM" Usually what I did was asking them back, "which exam are you taking", then they will say that they took the exam at their Uni now thay have to take it again. This is my moment of glory-sometimes I will ask them in a nice sarcastic way, do they have to resit their exam?? Sometimes, I was so close of telling them that I also played a lots during my Uni time but I don't have to resit any of my exams!!! And some more with the stupid slang!!!! Choi lah....

Seriously, most Malaysian that I met here in my office have no respect to other fellow mankind. They think with their paltinum card and their stupid british slang their can treat others with no respect. Pleaselah have some respect to others regardless of who they are. Every man in this world deserves a respect from anothers. It really hit me hard on how people treat others, I think all the problems in the world can be solve if people treat others with respect.

Please lah, enough already

Found this while blog surfing

http://www.techblogy.com/kelvinlovesirenetan/a-letter-to-siti-nurhaliza-rayuan-demi-peri-kemanusiaan/

this really sum up what I felt about 'wedding of the year'. What really bothered me was the statements that came out from the bride and the groom. " kita buat sederhana sahaja"...hello, if you spend RM50K for one baju, then the whole thing is about RM500k-sederhana apa tu???

Please lah, there are hungry people outhere, there are war going on from the other side of the world. Be a bit sensitive, can or not??

Tolonglah.....

Love ends when marriage starts

Is this true? I was listening to Sinar FM sometimes ago( don't ask, my husband listen to it, HO, you have a new fan!)One caller call in and they were talking about(well, I can't remember what topic). The DJ asked him are you in love, then the caller replied, no, I'm married. Then HO said more reason for you to be in love which the caller replied, love ends when marriage begins. I was laughing at first but then it kindda sunk in. It does sound kinnda true. Most married people will stop doing what they did as a couple when they get married. And this leads to them being bored to each other,believe me I know. I've been married for 7 years remember?

Very seldom that we have a chance to go out for dinner just the two of us, or go on a date for that matter, and I know there are people after married who stop doing that all together. I know this is not healthty but sometimes they don't have a choice. Once they have kids, works and other responsibilities, you don't have time to pamper your husband/wife. You start to take them for granted and this is when the loving stops.

I don't want this to happen to my marriage eventhough my feeling towards my husband has changed 360 degree from our courting time but I still made an effort to make our marriage works. I still love him but this time the love is a different kind of love. My love for him has changed from "can't get my hands off you" love to "Thank you for taking out the gabbage" kind of love.

Maybe the caller is right, love stops when marriage begins but may be we can love our partner differently or we made an effort to make sure that we still love each other no matter what then we can say that love does not stop when marriage begins but it grows as time goes by. That would be better right?

Dream a little dream....

Dream A Little dream- Beautiful South

Stars shining bright above you
Night breezes seem to whisper I love you
Birds singing in the sycamore tree
Dream a little dream of me

Say nighty-night and kiss me
Just hold me tight and tell me you'll miss me
While I'm alone and blue as can be
Dream a little dream of me

Stars fading, but I linger on dear
Still craving your kiss
I'm longing to linger till dawn dear
Just saying this

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you
Sweet dreams that leave our worries behind you
But in your dreams whatever they be
Dream a little dream of me

Stars fading, but I linger on dear
Still craving your kiss
I'm longing to linger till dawn dear
Just saying this

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you
Sweet dreams that leave our worries far behind you
But in your dreams whatever they be
Dream a little dream of me

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you
Sweet dreams - our worries behind you
But in your dreams whatever they be
Dream a little dream of me
Sweet dreams
Sweet dreams
Sweet dreams
Sweet dreams

this is the song by Beautiful south and was featured in the movie 'French Kiss' starring Meg Ryan and Kevin Kline-nice romantic movie.

But I'm not going to talk about the movie(eventhough the movie had a very special meaning in my life, ahhhh...power of love!!)I'm talking about dreams, how many of us still dreams, any dreams. I do. I keep dreaming of a better life, having a successful career, happy family, beautiful kids(I think this dream has comes true). At first it was quite difficult for me to start dreaming again after all my dreams have been squashed by reality of life!! But then somewhere in 2002, we joined this business called OT(kindda MLM, in this business they believe in power of dream. In fact the first question that they asked you was what are your dreams?? At first I was clueless, what are my dreams?? I dreamt a lots when I was young but like i said before it was squased by life it self. Then I started dreaming again, dreaming about what I wanted to be. This gives me hope, makes me strive harder for everything that I did.

Why it is hard for us to dream?? And the funny thing is dreams are free my freinds, they are free and yet many of us are afraid of dreaming. You can dream but janganlah macam Mat Jenin. We must have a dream to make this world goes round. Without dream, there will be no Disneyland, no Playhouse Dsiney(imagine my kids without playhouse Disney)

So, my friends I'm in a dreamy mood today...dreaming of what life would be if I stop working, if my husband can give me RM10k only for my expenses, having the luxury of doing anything that I want to do like going back NOW.................

Sediakan payung sebelum hujan

How true...how very true. This happens to me today- my father asked me to take an umbrella before I off to work, but I'm too malas to take it plus the umbrella that I took earlier was not working!!! Arrived at KLCC-it was raining heavily-there is no way I'm gonna walk in that rain. Called office said that I will be a little bit late,went around KLCC-looked at the watch-alamak 12 noon already, looked outside still raining. What choice to I have?? I had to buy an umbrella!!! Cost me RM10.00, this umbrella will never leave my bag. Niver want the same thing to happened again. This buying an umbrella thingy had started the urge of shopping in me.

Went to Body Shop, looked around. Saw the hair brush that I desperately needed, looked again, then suddenly remembered that I have to buy a new lisptick. So, left BS after spending RM93.00!!! My husband so gonna kill me but those things are needed, not wanted. As an ex economics student, I really have to satisfied my need, right?? Needs are not wants!!!

I guess after spending almost 2 weeks with the 'shopoholics' series, I have becoming one-well close anyway. But it was a great feeling actually, shopping theraphy. Wish I can do it everyday. Went to work feeling happy, everybody benefit from this-especially my customers. Luckily for my first customer who I spent time for more than 30 minutes then decided not to pay for her exam, nasib baik I'm not on commision kalau tak tarak untung!!!!

Ahhhhh.............next time people, sediakan payung sebelum hujan!!!!!

Term of endearment

This came to mind last night as I was about to sleep. I was felling rather sick last night-told my dear husband that I think that I have a slight fever-hoping for a bit of sympathy but what do I get-NOTHING. He fell a sleep right away. Then it got me thinking(funny what is in your mind when you are feeling sick)

We do not have any term of endearment, I mean some of you call each other -Abang, Adik, some of you Abang, sayang, some darling, and other panggilan. We have nothing. I call my husband his second name, at first to annoyed him but it kindda stuck, I kindda like it as nobody call him by his second name. He call me....emmmm let me think, oh ya he call me "awak" as in you. How romantic is that?? I did ask him to call me "sayang" and do you know what was his replied "tak nak, nanti orang kata mengada-ngada". How can calling your wife sayang be a mengada-ngada?? I really don't get it, but on the other hand, I refused to call him 'abang'-to me why should I call him 'abang'-he is not my brother. Come to think about this I don't even call my own brother Abang. So, I guess we are even in this department.

Anyway, it's too late to start calling each other differently now. We've known each other for 10 years, been married for 7 years. I guess at the end of the day it does not really matter what you call each other as long as you love each other right?? Agree with me people- I need the assurance!!!!

I'm in love....again

Seriously, I'm falling in love with a character from a book, again.

The first time I fell in love with a fiction hero was after SPM when I was about 18 years old. It was Matthew Allen Farrell, from 'Paradise'-Judith Mcnaught. I was so smitten by him that I told everybody that he is my dream guy. I even told my then boyfriend that I wanted to marry someone like Matt Farrell who then was so stupid to wrote on my birthday card "Mrs. Matthew Farrell', which then freaked out my parents really good. They really thought that I will end up marrying a mat salleh, they lectured me about the cons of marrying mat saleh my whole journey from home to airport which was about an hour!!! Then I realized that I cannot end up with such a stupid man..helloo...the reason I told you that so that you can be like Matt lah bodoh, bukan suruh you freaked out my parents!!!

After that, no one can take his place, I read lots of romance book-believe me i did but none can take his place until Jack Harper, I'm in love with him....he is the character from Sophie Kensall-'Can you keep a secret'. After more than 1 decade, I finally found a new man that can make my heart stops and wish I were single again. I could not put down the book and I keep reading it over and over again-mind you the book I borrowed was from the library and I only have one week, so better make full use of it. Really seriously thinking about buying the book but then have to think of waht reason to tell Amli..ehhh..may be to spice up our love life. Do you think he believes men if I tell him that?

Now, cannot stop from thinking about Jack...ahhhhhhhhh Jack Harper, I love you. So, ladies and gentlemen meet my new guy Jack Harper.

As Good As It Gets

I’ve been having this feeling for quite some times, actually it’s been bugging me since things are not going my way. And recently I had this conversation with my colleague about this thing. What if my life is as good as it gets?? No matter what I did or pray for a change in my life but if this is it, things will not change right? I know God is fair but sometimes I wish He would tell me,” Noriza Stop, this is it. Stop looking for a new job, stop trying to improve your life, you will never be rich or famous. This is YOU. This is what I want you to be.”

On the other hand, you will never know right? What if you can be better, if you just changed. That is why I wish God will tell me, when to stop and when to change. This guessing game is driving me mad. Things have been stagnant for me, no changes, none what so ever. Hai ya very frustrating, job is like crap, personal life non existed, love life so-so. My life is nothing to shout about. And I don’t like this. I used to berangan that I will be someone special, I will have a very satisfying career, high flyer. I will be the decision maker, I have my own room with drop dead gorgeous secretary( preferable some one who looks like Orlando Bloom or Colin Firth in a tight jeans and t-shirt), instead I’m end up as a receptionists. Ciss, wasted those 5 years in UK.

Please lah, tell me is this it or I can look for a better future somewhere else. God, please tell me and if you do I promise I will be a good girl.