Life goes on

This year mark my 10 years in SNE (Special Needs Education) field.  First few years was exciting and tough times for me.  I freshly graduated from my Diploma in Special Needs Education, fresh with ideas and theory but so lack in practicality of special needs education.  Nothing prepares for the reality..a bit help when you have special needs daughter yourself but like the saying no special needs child are a like,,well its true.  AND nothing prepares me on how to deal with denial parents...oh dear this is a different story all together.

The first 2 years, I was operating my own center but with another school, it's like a special needs center within a typical kindergarten.  I wanted to offer an inclusive environment where my students can mingle with typical kids and typical kids can learn that some friends are different but not less.  The first year, I worked for FREE.  We had 8 students, 1 teacher..yours truly and 1 Occupational therapist, who was so kind to almost work for free too.  The second year we were much better, our students increased to 11 and we have to open another class, employed another teacher, and still working for FREE.

Third year in operation, the principal from the typical school suggested that we moved to a big space where we can have more students, and she suggested that we combined.  I was not keen on the idea at the first place, but she convinced me that nothing changed.  In fact, it will be easier for me as I do not have to handle finance part of it, which actually I do not mind.  I enjoyed doing it as I can practice what I learned during my degree time.  After a while I agreed to it after she reassured me NOTHING WIL CHANGE.  Little did I know, the fourth year, somehow from owning my own business, I became merely an employee.  I do have my say in how I run my unit, but when it comes to expenses and budgeting..I was cast aside..and what got to me was that my unit brings the largest income to the school and yet the treatment that we received from the management was so bad that I feel that I have to beg for money.  

Time goes by and COVID hit us, the kindy did not survived but my special needs unit survived and somehow, we found ourselves with new management.  We have been sold to another business entity.  Was I consulted on this..NOTHING..but wait why should I? I was just an employee.  But I guess Allah has a better plan for us.  Now I'm managing this wonderful centre, with the same wonderful team and wonderful company.  

I love working in this field.  It is an amazing feeling when you see your students bloom and progress. There were times I came back with tears in my eyes, having the I fail feeling.  The feeling that I have not done enough for the students.  

Now, I'm more of managing the centre rather than teaching.  Do I miss it, yes but do I want to do it again?  Maybe not..age has catching up with me, teaching the special needs students take lots of energy which I do not have anymore.  Having said that, I would rather deal with my students that their parents. Ya Allah, dealing with parents is a different ball altogether.  That deserved a post of their own😂😂 

Alhamdullilah for the past 10 years..a very exciting and educational journey, as the saying goes...life goes on.