You Raise Me Up

Last Saturday was Tasya concert. She has to be at the concert hall by 8am. We decided to leave Adik at my parents's place since Adik will get restless during the concert like she did 2 years ago. We arrived at the hall at 8am, send Tasya to her teachers, while the rest of us decided to have a hot drink while waiting for time to get into the hall. This year we decided to get there earlier than last year since for the past 2 years we only managed to get to he back of the hall eventhough we arrived there on time.

At 9am, we decided to go to the hall-already there were people waiting at the door, at about 9.15 there were almost 100 parents waiting in a very small spaces with little ventilation. You can imagine the raising heat of the people there. There were some parents who complained, saying out loud like why can't the teachers let us in. We will not disturb the stage, etc, etc. I was like "hello...they asked you to come at 10-you are early-so waitlah"-I was saying this inside my heartlah. I can totally understand the teachers, why they did not open the door earlier-knowing all these parents-they think just because they send their kids there, the teachers must listen to them. There were this couple behind me, the wife was so rude-saying all the bad things about the teachers, she even asked her husband to bang the door so that the teachers inside will open the door. The husband could not be bothered to entertain her. Finally she herself went to the door and with all of us watching in disbelief-she bangon the door as loudly as she could. Come on lah. Everday during my working time, I was on the other side, I really hate it when people come early then ketuk-ketuk pintu nak masuk cepat. I purposely will ignore them.

There were 15 classes, and Tasya class was the 11 class to perform. Her class's theme was hip hop music. If I'm not mistaken the song was JLo song. Overall this year concert was very enjoyable. I know lots of song that I can sing along with Azrai. There were song from Lizzie Mcguire movie, of course from High School Musical, and also song from VE.

At the end of the concert, all kids sang this song "you raise me up'-dedicated especailly to the parents. We were encouraged to sing along with them. This is the first time that I'm actually listen to the words and I was so closed to tears when the kids sang that song. They were singing this song to all their mummies and daddies but to me my kids raise me up. They are the reasons for whatever I did, I will make sure that they are happy, they have enough love from both of us. Sometimes I think that I spoilt all my kids,I cannot hear them cry, I will try to fulfill their needs, I love my kids so very much. When I sing that song I sang it for my kids. Do you know that we did not have a proper bed? For the past 2 years we slept on a comforter set? Every time we want to buy a proper bed some thing can up that we have to use the cash for more important things for the kids. And the bed is also free bed courtesy of Mark Augustine(one of the teacher at my centre, nak balik kampung so want to get rid of his bed)

To me my kids are the wind beneath my wings......

You Raise me Up-Josh Groban
When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary
When troubles come and my heart burdened be
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence
Until you come and sit awhile with me

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders
You raise me up...to more than I can be

(Music plays for 30 seconds)

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders
You raise me up...to more than I can be

(Choir comes in background as music comes in hard)

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders
You raise me up...to more than I can be

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders
You raise me up...to more than I can be

You raise me up...to more than I can be

Not an IT illiterate afer all

I was never good at IT, I can do all the basis ones like Microsoft office applications but never beyond that. So, it was a big step for me doing this blog thingy. I can never understand the language of computer, HTML lah, C++ lah....never understand it. I'm sure you know this just by looking at my blogs right, the basis ever.

I do have the desire to learn more about IT or computing,it's just that I do not have the patience to actually doing it. And somemore all the computer language..alamak speak in Englishlah. However, if you look at my other blog, the one that I dedicated to my kids, you will see that I have add a new feature in that blog. I have added the age meter or whatever you call it all by myself!!!! I'm kinnda proud of it actually. Don't ask how long it took me but at least something huh??

Now, I want to add a link to this blog...see if I can do it without any help from my dear friend-yatie(who taught me how to do the link for my other blog-see if I can remembered how to do it!!!)

Life is a journey, not the destination

Someone send me this poem, title 'the station' few years ago, at that time I deleted the email-without realizing the impact the poem will give me later in life. The poem is about the one person journey in life where the writer missed all the wonderful things that he encounter on his way to the station. When he reached there, only then he realized that he is supposed to enjoy the journey and there is nothing waiting for him at the station.

I only remembered back this poem after watching 'Click'(Adam Sandler) last week. This movie is sort of a wake up call for me. I keep having this question inside my head, is it worth it, the life that we are living now. We are always rushing in life-we forget to stop and smell the roses!! It has become increasingly hard for us to have a work life balance, the employer expects you to work 24/7 for them. They don't really give a damn about your family-if your salary is 4K, they expect you to work double the amount. How many of you have to stay back after 5pm just because this is what the boss expect from you eventhough your heart is screaming wanting to go back to your much neglected family?? But can we actually afford the work life balance??

I have been wanting to quit my job since I gave birth to my first child, and it has been 6 years since that, still here I am working my a** off. Everytime I wanted to just do it, somethings keep playing in my mind-can we actually afford it if I quit my job?? That is the catch, life here in KL is so damn expensive that both of us have to work just to make ends meet. Maybe we can just leave KL and move to another state. I kindda like Terengganu actually, do you know that there is no shopping mall in KT??? Another place that I like is Alor Setar. Both places are much cheaper than KL, but do we dare to have such a drastic changes? Leaving all the things that we like and familiar with?? I like to go to shopping malls, can I leave in KT without the shopping malls? And if I choose Kedah, sometimes I could not really understnd their dialect, can I live there too??

It's realy hard when it comes to this decision right?? You want to spend more time with your family but if this means that you have to struggle financially, are you willing to take the risk??

So, how can we take it easy, and really enjoy the journey when you are caught in this mad rat race...the faster you ran, the more you need to catch it...and what is IT??? I really want to enjoy the journey and I'm afraid that I will regret it when I reach at the station nothing is there for me.

No News....yet

They said they will tell me this week either I will get the job or not. Today is Tuesady, still no news from them. Some people says that no news is a good news, is it so?? I'm so want to get out from this place, sometimes I feel so suffocate here. I cannot breathe, is this bad? I guess so. I guess after 4 years of doing exactly the same things do get into you.

I need a break from all of this, the rat race,with the same routine all over again, please lah help me!!!

Interview ? Test ? Part 2

Well, went for the test yesterday. Luckily it was computer based exam, so have spelling check!! At least 1 problem less.

It has 3 questions, the first time I saw the questions, macam nak nangis!!! My first thought was "how to answer this questions!!". After awhile looking at the question paper, oklah..I can answer this.

The first Q was answering an email regarding the product. I was like dielah, how can I remember all the product details....I was like cursing myself, why I did not bring the print out about their company. I did during the interview. Then suddenly I remembered I did have it in my bag!!. Jeng!Jeng!, they never say anything about open book exam-so apa lagi...took the print out and the process of copy paste began!!! That's what I did at the beginning anyway, after that I had my doubt-what if they want to test my creativity, so like what I always did during the Uni year, change the wordslah, from passive to active phrases-biasalah.

Question no 2, they gave you bunch of numbers and ask you to do whatever you want with that numbers, as in translate the numbers to readable data. I was like....ahhhhhhhhhhhhh...macamana nie?? I left the question 2 first, went to answer Q3.

Q3 is the scenario Q. They gave you a customer service situation and you have to tell them how you will solve the problem. This part...bantai part.

Then went back to Q2, suddenly I remembered that I had calculator inside my bag, apalagi aku pun buatlah mathematic kat situ!!! I'm not sure either the calculations are right or wrong-tapi pedulik apa!!!

Finally the 45 mins were up, passed the answer paper, and pray to Allah that everything will be alright. If HE says that this is where my rezeki is, I will get the job but if HE says that BC is where I belong..so be it.

Interview ? Test ?

I attended a job interview last Tuesday, after almost 4 years of not attending any job interview it's really give me a panic attack. I really do not know what to do or what to say in the interview.(compared to my other half, who attend job interview on a very regular basis...say once in every 6 months!!)

The job that I applied is the same job that I'm doing now just different company from British to American( can guess huh?). During the interview, they gave me the JD and when I looked at it, alamak-sama lah. They(BTW there a 4 of them and 1 of me)asked me do you have any questions with the JD, told them no since this is exactly when I'm doing now( kerek tak?). They asked lots of questions, I keletong all the time but I asked questions too. Just so that I look intelligent, the Qs that they asked are all in the days work while the questions that I asked are all about how well you treat your staff. Have to show also that I am not desperate for the job just looking for a better opportunity.

Honestly I really do not know how I performed in the interview. I guess I did well but you never knew right? All of my colleagues are confident that I nailed them but I have my doubt. So, it was quite a surprised when they called me yesterday morning saying that they want me to do a written test. I was alamak..test ka? Know when the last time I did any test....ahhhhhhhh????? like 10 years ago. Matilah. I was so nervous, really takut nak pergi. Told my colleagues at work, all of them are very encouraging, so by hook or by crook I'm going to this test today at 3.30pm. So people wish me luck..lots of luck because I'm so gonna need it.

Arrogant, Idiotic woman

Yesterday at about 5pm, my colleague passsed me a fax from one of our corporate company regarding one of her staff. It was a very unpleasant letter complaining about out phone system.

I tried to call her yesterday itself but she was not available, tried calling her again this morning also unavailable. Then I left a message to her colleague asking her to return my call. I gave her my direct number(I seldom do this because then they will start bugging me)

She called me but at that time I was with a customer, so as soon as I'm done with my customer, I called her back. The moment she know that I was on the other line, she started bombarded me with all her complaints, saying that we have a stupid phone system, she kept talking to a machine and she is not happy with us etc,etc,etc. All this time I kept apologizing to her, still she went on and on and on about how she is not happy. Then I told her next time you can call my direct number but I'm telling you now if I'm with a customer I will not pick up my call, just leave a message and I will get back to you ASAP. You can guess her answer right, NOOOOOOO she does not want to speak to machine. Well, guess what, I also do not want to speak to you!!! Idiot woman. She is working with a company that handle ZARA( you know the shop that selling clothes). Really feel like going there and teach her a thing or two about manners!!!

I was really mad after talking to her, luckily Iren lend me her stress ball. Still I don't think that I deserved her stupid treatment. What to do, it's all comes with the job.

Salute to a very special mother

Yesterday I had a lunch date with a very good friend of mine. I met her when I was studying for my A-levels in UK. Our first encounter was a bit off, I was supposed to wait for her to go to our school together but I forgot about it and left her in London!!(luckily she was not alone)

After a while, we become close, we had so much common interest that we can talk to eadch other the whole day without realizing the time. During our first year, we were not in the same room but we always find way for us to meet up either intentionally or accidentally. There were one day that we met in the kitchen and end up talking until hours...our excuse was that we were taking a break from our studies( yeah...right!!) Both of us are so crazy about movies, we can watched movies the whole days!!! There one day that we were cinema hopping, from one screen to another!! THE WHOLE DAY!!!! We started from the first show at about 10am and our last show was about at 5pm. We managed to watch if I'm not mistaken 3 movies in one day!! Those were the days!

We kindda went our own way after the Uni days. Maybe due to our piority in life, we did try to call each other and email each other just to say hi and how are you. Both of us now a wife and a mother, while I was like a regular mother but she is a very special mother.

Both of us are blessed with a very special kids, yesterday watching her with her wonderful and beautiful daughter, I realized that I could never be like her. She was so patient, and so wonderful to her daughter. If I were her, I will like screaming and scolding my kids. She went a lot for her daughter, what she went thru made me realized that what I went thru with Adriana were nothing compared to her.

I learned a lots during our short encountered. Her patience, her skills on handling her daughter, and at the same she still the person she used to be. She still the warm person that she used to be, funny, helpful, generous and she is so good with her hand(menjahit-jahitlah). She did one of my dresses it was so beautiful and nicley done that I kept showing it to all my friends and relatives!! Now they want to do the same thing too( eh, can i get commision on this??)

She is a wonderful person and I'm so glad that I know her.