Ya Allah..kau permudah dan permewahkan lah rezeki ku...Aamiin YRA

 In shaa Allah, I will be meeting my big boss later today.  Mainly to report to him on how we are next year 2024, and also to ask him for a raise for me and my team.

We have been with this company for 2 years, last year we were generously given allowance that consisted half of our basis salary.  Mind you, our basic salary is very very low compared to the market rate.  This is nothing we can do about it.  With low basic salary, our EPF is also low, we do not contribute much to it which in the long run effected our pension fund.  Which is very important as everything is super expensive nowadays.

This year, we are hoping for an increase in our basic salary, to at least in the range of market rate.  That's for my teachers, as for me I'm asking for 363% increase in salary.  Is this too much??  I don't think so, considering that I'm single handly managing this center, from operation to sales and marketing to customer service to finance.  Basically I'm one man show.  And with more than 20 years working experience I deserve this.  It's about time that I've been given the reward that really reflect my worth.  And I'm praying that Allah swt will hear my prayer.  In shaa Allah, Aamiin YRA.

Only time will tell

Revisiting blogging now is a prefect time, for me anywhere.  People don't bother about blog anymore, so it is safe for me to write what I really feel about certain matter.  You cant really say what's really in your mind in IG or FB or even tik tok without creating conflicts with people in your life...but blogging at this time...wow!!! Write what you want..nobody read blog anymore.  

This has become a safe place for me.  So, no more barrier..the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.  I was so excited to pin down my thought..suddenly..NOTHING.  

I have something that I want to talk about-politics in Malaysia.  Now we are in the period that politicians in Malaysia are at the worse.  Corruption is somehow part of the it.  You must be corrupted to be in the politics.  And the worse is none of the politicians cared about the people.  They only care about themselves.  It's so tiring and this has been going on for the past 60 years.  And I do not see any light at the end of the tunnel.  How can you have a very progressive government if 90% of your MB are corrupted to the core??  They do not have any decent bones in their body.  So called religious party was a joke of the people.  Making stoooopiiiiid statememt, slap in face.  

I really wish that one day we can have a very good government that care for the people.  Where politicians are poor people.  Do you think that this can come true???/ Only time will tell.

Life goes on

This year mark my 10 years in SNE (Special Needs Education) field.  First few years was exciting and tough times for me.  I freshly graduated from my Diploma in Special Needs Education, fresh with ideas and theory but so lack in practicality of special needs education.  Nothing prepares for the reality..a bit help when you have special needs daughter yourself but like the saying no special needs child are a like,,well its true.  AND nothing prepares me on how to deal with denial parents...oh dear this is a different story all together.

The first 2 years, I was operating my own center but with another school, it's like a special needs center within a typical kindergarten.  I wanted to offer an inclusive environment where my students can mingle with typical kids and typical kids can learn that some friends are different but not less.  The first year, I worked for FREE.  We had 8 students, 1 teacher..yours truly and 1 Occupational therapist, who was so kind to almost work for free too.  The second year we were much better, our students increased to 11 and we have to open another class, employed another teacher, and still working for FREE.

Third year in operation, the principal from the typical school suggested that we moved to a big space where we can have more students, and she suggested that we combined.  I was not keen on the idea at the first place, but she convinced me that nothing changed.  In fact, it will be easier for me as I do not have to handle finance part of it, which actually I do not mind.  I enjoyed doing it as I can practice what I learned during my degree time.  After a while I agreed to it after she reassured me NOTHING WIL CHANGE.  Little did I know, the fourth year, somehow from owning my own business, I became merely an employee.  I do have my say in how I run my unit, but when it comes to expenses and budgeting..I was cast aside..and what got to me was that my unit brings the largest income to the school and yet the treatment that we received from the management was so bad that I feel that I have to beg for money.  

Time goes by and COVID hit us, the kindy did not survived but my special needs unit survived and somehow, we found ourselves with new management.  We have been sold to another business entity.  Was I consulted on this..NOTHING..but wait why should I? I was just an employee.  But I guess Allah has a better plan for us.  Now I'm managing this wonderful centre, with the same wonderful team and wonderful company.  

I love working in this field.  It is an amazing feeling when you see your students bloom and progress. There were times I came back with tears in my eyes, having the I fail feeling.  The feeling that I have not done enough for the students.  

Now, I'm more of managing the centre rather than teaching.  Do I miss it, yes but do I want to do it again?  Maybe not..age has catching up with me, teaching the special needs students take lots of energy which I do not have anymore.  Having said that, I would rather deal with my students that their parents. Ya Allah, dealing with parents is a different ball altogether.  That deserved a post of their own😂😂 

Alhamdullilah for the past 10 years..a very exciting and educational journey, as the saying goes...life goes on.  

Give peace a chance ❤️

World has gone crazy. Well it has been for a long time but this time it's really went crazy with capital C. So called the big power in the world, the so-called peacemaker has gone silent to what we called modern genocide. It is sad to read, hear and see the news today. I've been avoiding talking about it because it affected me deeply. How could someone do something so horrible to an innocent people, babies, old people. Ya Allah, I really cannot comprehend it all. 

But I have the highest admiration to the people of Pale stian. I was watching this TT and this lady, an American revert lady was telling about the special people of Pale stian and she said the word steadfast perfectly describe them. Their tawakal to Allah, Masya Allah even with the death surrounding them, their put their trust in Allah completely. 

While, here we are at our own world, when there was even a small obstacle facing our lives, we quickly become agitated and started to blame others, we quickly forgot that Allah has it own plan. And Allah is the best planner. Do you think Allah will let the people of Pale stian alone in this? Allah has greater plan for them, and being who they are, they accepted their fate with smile on their face. 

We should really learn from them. And we should give peace a chance, we should start with the man in the mirror. We should start with ourselves, with our family. Love each other, care for each other. Sometimes it hard but what is easy in this world?? NOTHING is easy but if we learn to respect each other, learn to accept others and learn to loved one and another, In shaa Allah we will have a very peaceful world. 

Give peace a chance.

OMG!!!!!!

It's been ages since the last time I was here. I almost forgot about this. Tsaya mentioned it few weeks ago about my other blog-3 little rascals. And this morning, my good friend Yatie tag me the link to her blog spot entry in FB and viola..I found mine. My last entry was in January 2012, 11 years ago. Things has changed so much. So many things has happened for the last 11 years, I guess that's good right, it showed that my life was not static :) Carrer wise, no longer with BC, for 5 years running my own centre then somehow along the way, lost it and I found myself an employee rather than owner..kahkahkah. Lost my father in 2019, it was devastated then covid hit us in 2020. In 2022, found new employer and been there even since. Running a centre for kids with special needs. Kids from 3 to 4 to 5 then 6 in 2015. I guess that is that. We stop at no 6. Let's make blogging update as my new year resolution.

Find money somewhere else...

I'm stuck in a stand still traffic in KL...it's Friday evening and i'm on my way to may class..yes, people for the past 12 months, i've been attending this course. I'm taking a Diploma in Learning Disorder Mgmt & Child psychology. The class starts at 7pm, and here i am still inside the car next to Dang Wangi LRT station, it's 7.30pm. What get to me was for the whole week the weather was hot, i meant Hotwith capital H...and Friday evening it thunderstorm in KL....why?why?why?. Very the mencabar one to go to class like this...and my exam is in 2 weeks time.
It's a good thing that i have my ipad with me...yes, ppl i have an ipad..it's only ipad one but i got one..a present from Amli..he got it free from Prudential for meeting his target for last year. A first he promised me an ipad 2 but he changed his mind after seeing the two..so here i am with the 1.. Better tahn nine right???
I have made up my mind..this year will be the final year I'm calling my self a white collar slave..after my final exam, my dream of becoming a stay at home mom will soon come true. Finally i have the courage to say this out loud and once you said it, you will do it. I had enough at work..things has gone from bad to worse and like Harrison Ford said in 'Regarding Harry', i had enough so i i said when. This is what happen to me and an advice from my ex boss- if u are not happy get out..u can find money elsewhere..which is kind of true..
Things are really bad this year..i guess i have no passion in my work anymore..my passion now is with my kids and my dream of opening a centre for special needs kids that intregated with normal kids. I'm hoping that this will materialised soon.
Amli is ok with me quitting my job, the big challenge is how to tell this to my parents??? Will they be dissapointed with me?? I really hope that they understand that this is not what i what to do with the rest of my life. The thing with my parents is that they are conservative..yo them ur happiness is secondary, what important is u are working..maybe i will tell them that i'll find money somewhere else....

Dusty...

My God..this blog is so dusty...

I left it out far too long. So many things has happened since the last time I visited this page. However, some things are unchanged. I'm still with the same company-different department tho. Had another baby..and this time it's a boy. So, now I have 3 girls and 2 boys.

I guess we can blame FB for the neglection of this blog. It's easier with FB when you can juat update ur status and will get immediate respond. Met some of my old friends even my ex via FB ;) and Amli is ok with this..well, he was not at first. He was quiet pissed off that my ex and I are friends in FB. Had a few unpleasant 'conversation' with him regarding this. But funny thing happened after that. Amli was still new with FB and he often asked me about FB. One day, he called me and said he had this friend request and he is not sure who she was. Somehow my gut told me that it was his xe..told him but he said no. I asked him to PM this person and asked her who is she, and true enough she was his EX..kah!kah!kah!..padan muka..marah kat I then his ex contacted him..he asked me what to do. Told him that it was Ok with me if he wants to be friends with her..heh..he married me right, buat apa lah nak jeles sgt unless Amli is Orlondo Bloom than that is a different story..;)

Life has been treating us good..we had few downs in fact there were times that things were so down that we find ourselves on the bottom of the rock..but we managed to pull everything up..now we can see the light at the end of the tunnel. And I found out when things are bad, the most important thing is you must trust and rely on each others. Never..never..never turn to somebody else..this might lead to another problem.

Then again, maybe for us is different because our problem was not entirely on our fault. It was someone else's fault. But now that's all in the past..I have forgive that person BUT I WILL NEVER FORGET WHAT HE DID TO OUR FAMILY!!! NEVER!!!

I'm now in the middle of my diploma..finally had the courage to take up part time class. I'm taking Diploma in Learning Management & Child Psychology. My aim for taking this is to have knowledge that can help Adriana. She has started school at Wangsa MAju Seksyen 2, in special class. Things are alhamdullilah...and hopefully I will have the time and the urge to update this blog... ;)